When we grieve, we often ask ourselves, Why? Why did it this have to happen to me? Why could God just spare their life? Why couldn’t we stop it from happening?
It is a normal part of grief to feel guilty when a person we love dies, especially when it happens so suddenly like it did with my mom.
When we grieve we need to have hope that with time the pain will get easier, and the happiness we lost as a result of their death will be once again be restored to us. This next poem –“The Reason” helped me a lot as I tried to come to accept that what had happened to her was the fault of no one, but the effects of an unforgiving disease, known as Type 1 Juvenile Diabetes.
In my head I search for an reason,
As to why you decided to stop fighting.
The disease that you could not accept,
Until its poison started to take effect,
It destroyed your body one organ at a time,
But little did we know of the crime,
That Diabetes was committing on you,
How could it be true?
That you are gone,
And we are still here, somehow expected to move on?
How can I ever forgive myself for not saving you,
From a disease that I never knew,
Could destroy a life so precious and innocent,
Oh, how I’d give anything to go back
to that day before you died,
to tell you “I love you” and to say my goodbye,
because, Mom, you are my everything.
Now, it’s time for you to go,
Go Home, and be with your King.
Don’t worry about me,
I’ll be alright. Just believe.